and a time to die.

My dad died a little over two weeks ago. Mom called me and my siblings to come home on Sunday, July 6. All of us were just ready to go to church. We all got to church, talked to a few people and then turned around and went to pack to Iowa. We spent Monday sitting with him and my mom, reading the Bible, talking and just waiting. At 5:10 he quit breathing. My mom and Emily were with him. Jay was calling Lydia and Hank and I had taken a walk to see how Sandy's house was coming. It just shows how helpless and ineffective we all are in the face of death. We watched Dad's health fail drastically since Christmas, Mom lovingly cared for him at home through some really hard times with the help of wonderful hospice nurses and we all sat with him off and on all day. But when it came time for God to actually call him home, we weren't ready for it. This year I have read "My times are in your Hands" over and over again. They truly are.

A Time to Live......

Its a beautiful warm summer night and we just had ice cream with the Jory's. All babies are wonderful and cute but Elliott just tugs at our hearts. After so many hospital stays and so much worry, its just so much fun to watch him grow and be so normal. While they were here, my mom called. Dad is "dying by inches" as she says every time I talk to her and I think she is getting weary. My brother-in-law was talking about how she is living out her wedding vows so beautifully and I think it is something we all should remember. In so many relationships we see or hear about, people give up so easily. Marriage is hard and watching my parents now is very poingnant.

In two weeks, Ryan and Steph and Ollie will be here. I can't wait to see Ollie walking and starting to talk. Elliott will be aware of him too so the cousins should have some fun times. I realize more and more how precious family time is. I am going to enjoy my kids and my grandboys a lot when we are together.

Happy Canada Day

Its Canada Day! I've lived in Canada almost 33 years now. I've been a Canadian for 5. I truly love this country and am glad I actually became a citizen. It took me a long time but it was mostly because I hate filling out forms. I didn't have a deep philosophical reason but in the end decided that this is my country. I am an American by birth and I appreciated my childhood there but I became the adult I am in Canada. So here's to CBC Radio (and TV), heath care, the parliamentary system and Tim Horton's!

Blogging again

Its been so long since I've posted anything, I don't know if anyone checks my page anymore. But I decided its time to start again. The time since my last post has been one of joy and worry. Gains and losses. Elliott and all his medical concerns and hospital stays. Kayla having such a hard time after the C-section as well as the stresses of a sick baby.(If you want the details, her blog is a beautiful testament to hard yet happy times.) My dad failing and now "dying by inches" as my mom says. Keeping up with the ups and downs of the BC Vande Kraats families. Along with the demands of school, sometimes it felt like almost too much.

But it never was. God was faithful. Elliott continued to smile through all his pokes and fasts. Kayla cried but stayed strong and we grew to love Harley even more for his steady and calm nature. Elliott's now a smiley little guy who poops on his own! Scott and Margaret struggled with some important decisions but are safely moved to Iowa and he will go back to Dordt in the fall. Hopefully she will find work soon. Ryan and Steph found a home of their own in Aldergrove. Wow! Good good stuff. And we will all be together for some time this summer. That really makes me smile.

Dad is dying. It seems so cold and harsh but it is the sad truth. Mom is faithful and is tending to him at home. Hopefully we can spend some more time there this summer. Quick trips in March and for Father's Day were good but I feel pulled there. So far Dad hasn't had a lot of pain but just the last few days, he's been more uncomfortable. A new concern for all of us.

I read this and realize now focused I am on the family around me. My kids are going to totally GROAN about this but what has helped me stay calm is the sun room and my garden. Its is such a haven. Hank and I gave in finally and bought an espresso machine so things are even better. We are putting new flooring in tonight and then I can sit with a book or my crossword book, drink lattes (iced or hot), look at which ever perennial is blooming, watch the birds and rabbit and relax. Everyone should have one!

Early Christmas present

I am excited because I got a little computer table so I can have my computer downstairs in the kitchen. I tried to make an office upstairs but the room was cold in winter and hot in summer. I think I will use it a lot more now and maybe even write more. That's the theory anyway.

Jason and Tara our nephew and his wife from the Edmonton area just left. They have three beautiful children - born in three years and a few months. She is a very busy mom but happy and proud of her kids. Jackson, Wyatt and Lily.

And I can't wait for our next grandchild to be born. Truly and advent season!

Confession

Its time to go back to school and I have to confess that this summer I developed an on-line addiction that I have to try to break. Its not Face Book - its a crazy kids game on the CBC website. Train Trax. I find it challenging and oddly soothing. Fortunately it doesn't run well on my school computer.

Check it out. www.cbc.ca/kids/games/traintrax/ (Sorry, I can't figure out how to make this a link.)

If anyone else gets hooked, maybe we can form a support group on Face Book!

August

Its a rainy and windy, sort of nice change.

This has been a busy summer. July flew by with visits from Scott and Margaret, Ryan, Steph and Ollie and of course, The Wedding. It was such a fun time. Its a little hard to imagine that Scott is married but he and Margaret are so good for each other. It makes me happy.

I also wrote a Kids Page for the Banner which will be published in October.

We just came back from a week in Minnesota. Two days with my brother and his family at a cabin on Woman Lake. Lots of fun - watching the kids play in the water, feeding ducks and tubing. My parents were there too. Its a tough time for them. Kev would have turned 50 last week and my dad's cancer is advancing again. It was good that we all could be together for a few days.

Then Hank and I went to Duluth and along the North Shore of Lake Superior. Foolishly we went to one of the most popular spots in Minnesota on a weekend with no reservations. We were lucky to get a place up by Tettegouche State Park. The downside was it was the LAST place available and probably shouldn't have been rented out. We survived and did see some beautiful scenery.

Now it is August. I always panic the first few days in August because it means summer is almost over but by the middle of the month, I am ready for the routine and challenge of school again. Hank goes back soon so the reality will hit then.

My coffee is gone. Time to go get another cup and watch the rain in the yard.